No Greater Gift

Thursday, Dec. 25, 2003 - 3:37 a.m.

People around the world are waking up today and it's Christmas.

John and I were supposed to go somewhere else last night to observe this holiday, but then a lot of things happened and we decided to stay home.

I did a lot of thinking about what constitutes a 'gift'.

This is going to sound a little off base, and maybe even ungrateful, but here's the skinny:

I decided that I never again want to receive a generic present given by somebody who never talks to me at any other time of the year.

That's what probably would have ended up happening if I'd gone anywhere today.

It's not that I'm not grateful. But I'd rather that money get sent to people who need it instead of spent on a tchotchke for me.

The gifts that I have loved the most this year are the ones that have not cost very much, but because they are gifts from the heart, they are priceless to me.

The most recent of these gifts was an allotment of time for a visit in person by Todd Thalimer. Other gifts include my dear Jamie Lord managing to make me laugh when I thought that was the last thing on the planet that I'd ever feel like doing; exchanges with Glenn Schmall via Yahoo Instant Messenger even when he was busy, webcamming with my brother and pretending to catch kisses bestowed by my niece and nephew and seeing their reaction; a call from Cher1 H3ys3 when she had a Funny Feeling about me last week and just wanted to see if I was okay, and the trust shown to me by JJ when I photographed her body art.

Those are things that no amount of money could replace.

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One of the people I met at last year's family gathering found out that I was a Pagan, and began sending me Christian centered humor and anecdotes in email. I thanked her for her correspondence, and then I sent her the words to this song.

She never emailed me again. I have no idea why.

The Christians And The Pagans

by Dar Williams

Amber called her uncle, said "We're up here for the holiday,
Jane and I were having Solstice; now we need a place to stay."
And her Christ-loving uncle watched his wife hang Mary on a tree,
He watched his son hang candy canes all made with Red Dye No. 3.
He told his niece, "Its Christmas Eve, I know our life is not your style,"
She said, "Christmas is like Solstice, and we miss you and its been awhile."

So the Christians and the Pagans sat together at the table,
Finding faith and common ground the best that they were able,
And just before the meal was served, hands were held and prayers were said,
Sending hope for peace on earth to all their gods and goddesses.

The food was great, the tree plugged in, the meal had gone without a hitch,
Till Timmy turned to Amber and said, "Is it true that you're a witch?"
His mom jumped up and said, "The pies are burning," and she hit the kitchen,
And it was Jane who spoke, she said, "It's true, your cousin's not a Christian,"
"But we love trees, we love the snow, the friends we have, the world we share
And you find magic from your God, and we find magic everywhere,"

So the Christians and the Pagans sat together at the table,
Finding faith and common ground the best that they were able,
And where does magic come from? I think magic's in the learning,
'Cause now when Christians sit with Pagans only pumpkin pies are burning.

When Amber tried to do the dishes, her aunt said, "Really, no, don't bother."
Amber's uncle saw how Amber looked like Tim and like her father.
He thought about his brother, how they hadn't spoken in a year,
He thought he'd call him up and say, "It's Christmas, and your daughter's here."
He thought of fathers, sons and brothers, saw his own son tug his sleeve, saying,
"Can I be a Pagan?" Dad said, "We'll discuss it when they leave."

So the Christians and the Pagans sat together at the table,
Finding faith and common ground the best that they were able,
Lighting trees in darkness, learning new ways from the old, and
Making sense of history and drawing warmth out of the cold.

---

I think the best gift that's happened this year is the restoration of my trust in people, after the year I've experienced. So many people have been instrumental in this. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

I hope that if you are observing today's holiday, that you all have a peaceful day.

Merry Christmas to all of you.

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8 of my readers commented on this entry

Dani
Since your comments looked empty I decided to say MERRY CHRISTMAS, even tho I'm talking to you now :)
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Jamie
You know that is one of my favorite songs. :) Your friendship with me is one of my greatest gifts ever, and I know that this next year will be better. Even though our online chats and visits are more brief and further between; I know that you are there and, if I take my medication regularly, you know that I am here. (Tee hee) I love you so very much, and the gifts should be heading out in tomorrow's mail. One may confuse you, and I don't remember if I enclosed a note... Think "GFA". (Private joke between Brin & I.) For Brin's readers: (Brin knows this.) Just because we are Pagans does not mean that we cannot celebrate on that day like the Christians. This is the day I celebrated growing up. We [Pagans] just have different things to celebrate. I know that when we celebrate at Nelson's sister's today for brunch, there will be Christians and Pagans sitting at the table. And you know what? I wouldn't have it any other way. Have a wonderful day Brin, and Brin's readers! I love you, my sweet Brin, and I *will* be online tonight. :) ~ Jamie
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Sarah
I likes the lyrics to the song. Your descriptions of the greatest gifts you recieved really tugged at the heartstrings. It's wonderful that there IS someone else out there who is not obsessed by all the commercialism of the holiday. Happy Holidays to you and yours. Sarah
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karen
i LOVE "the christians and the pagans." LOVE it! old school dar williams is so awesome. anyway, last night i went to the san francisco gay men's chorus' annual holiday concert. they sang "the christians and the pagans." it was awesome! happy holidays!
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Todd
Fa la la la la....Happy Holidays! Glad we could exchange time and a few precious material posessions a few days ago. Hope you have a nice holiday! And John too!
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Boogity
Have a joyous Decemberween! Also, I like that song. "The Blessings" is another good one by her.
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jj
loving you brin. looking forward to next week. love,
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John
Reading this post was another gift, love; Happy Solstice and Merry Christmas!
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