Friday Five & Farrell

Friday, Sept. 14, 2007 - 12:29 a.m.

Britney -- lose the extensions and buy some panties.

Give both ends a rest.

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With thanks to FARK -- I generally don't find myself compelled to relate a Favorite Colin Farrell Story, but if I ever were, this is the one I'd share.

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Dear Online Friends:

I'm not interested in joining any more online communities. You can find me on Diaryland, and also on MySpace, Usenet (yes, it's still around), and there's even a little sprinkling of me over on LiveJournal and Blogger. That's plenty.

No offense, but I won't be accepting anymore networking invites. Too many of them offer to send spiders over to my email account to find other victims. I don't think that's right, and I just don't want to participate.

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A second woman was asked to cover up before being allowed to stay on a Southwest Airlines flight.

This is extremely disconcerting, especially since as my friend Bob Lai mentioned in chat the other night, it's going to be mighty difficult to prove that a shapely woman is a threat to airline security.

But it begs the question -- Since Southwest Airlines seems to have gotten its knickers in a twist over great big tits, I think I would have a lot of fun making a big production of covering my own 40G rack up somehow, once I'm aboard and seated.

I'm open to suggestions.

Burqa? Space blanket? Trash bag?...

Anybody have any clever ideas that would serve as a coverup and double as a protest, but not get me on a watch-list?

You are now free to move about the country as long as you're ugly.

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And finally, a Friday Five:

What was the most sick that you've ever been?

In 1983 I had ulcerative colitis, which kept me in the hospital for more than a month. Three out of four people who get this disease worldwide will die from it because the medical protocols and surgical alternatives don't exist in most of the rest of the world. You're looking at the writing of the fucking LUCKY fourth.

What disease are you afraid of getting?

Anything that makes my mind stop functioning before my body does.

Are you a big baby when it comes to taking medicine/shots for your illnesses?

Nope. Either you let the needle run your life, or you do not. The decision is yours.

Is going to the doctor really THAT bad?

Only if it's a really bad doctor.

Would you have the flu twice a month if you were paid $1,000 for having it?

Nope. Make it just during the summer when my allergies are shitting on me anyway, and make the incidents ten thousand. Then we'll talk.

Wanna play, the link is to the left.

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And there we go. Have a good Friday.

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