English

Saturday, Jun. 07, 2003 - 8:10 a.m.

I've been thinking of getting the McLaughlin household a cell phone with some of the take from Fanime Con, but despite being online in one form or another since 1988 -- via a Commodore SX64 and a blistering 1200-baud modem -- I still have a problem with some of the shortcuts used in cell phones' text messages.

Maybe I'll wait until Mark Twain's proposal comes true:

A Plan for the Reform of English Spelling
by Mark Twain

For example, in Year 1, that useless letter "c" would be dropped to be replased either by "k" or "s", and likewise "x" would no longer be part of the alphabet. The only kase in which "c" would be retained would be the "ch" formation, which will be dealt with later. Year 2 might reform "w" spelling, so that "which" and "one" would take the same consonant, wile Year 3 might well abolish "y", replasing it with "i", and Iear 4 might fiks the "g/j" anomali wonse and for all.

Jenerally, then, the improvement would continue iear bai iear with Iear 5 doing awai with useless double konsonants, and Iears 6 - 12 or so modifaiing vowlz and the rimeining voist and unvoist konsonants. Bai Iear 15 or so, it wud fainali bi posibl to meik ius ov thi ridandant leterz "c", "y" and "x" -- now jast a memori in the maindz ov ould doderz -- tu riplais "ch", "sh", and "th" rispektivli.

Fainali xen, afte sam 20 iers ov orxogrefkl riform, wi wud hev a lojikl, kohirnt speling in ius xrewawt xe Ingliy-spiking werld.

---

He wrote the above in 1899, and there are days when I think it's closer to the truth than he ever imagined it would be.

Personally, I think Hell, if such a place exists, is freezing over as we speak... The Oxford English Dictionary announced its new additions, and among the words and phrases are 'copy and paste' and 'bling-bling'.

Gods help us all.

---

0 of my readers commented on this entry

---

what you missed - what's next - leave a note - email the pope
first post - random entry - cast page - my diaryrings - top ten

THE LEGAL STUFF: All content on this site that was created by me is copyright 2003-2009 Brin-Marie McLaughlin. Steal my stuff and I'll squash you like a bug. All incoming email is subject to publication or other distribution by me in whole or in part at my sole discretion. This diary features the sole opinions and experiences of one person, namely me, the person who is paying for the space. Anything else on these pages including any comments belongs to whoever created it. In the interest of safety and accountability, no anonymous comments will ever be allowed here, ever, for any reason in the entire history of ever. The comments section is part of my paid presence on the web, and is used by my readership to supplement the things I have written here with relevent information in a polite manner. Comments that do not fall in that category are subject to deletion at my whim. Your use of my comments section constitutes the understanding of this statement. Anything else on these pages including any comments belongs to whoever created it. All external links are current as of the date of the entry in which they are featured. News excerpts used here are for educational purposes and are permitted under the Fair Use Doctrine.