Deadhead & Dragons

Sunday, Apr. 02, 2006 - 7:09 a.m.

The first thing I always do when I finish pulling your leg on April Fool's Day is to prowl the worldwide news services to see if there are any truly spectacular pranks or false stories to share with you all.

The result this year is that I found the following story. It has set off my Shergoldometer, but until I see otherwise, I'm going to assume it's true:

(04-02) 04:39 PDT Sonoma, California (AP) -- The long, strange trip continues for Jerry Garcia's toilet. Police say the Grateful Dead leader's commode was stolen recently from a driveway along with three other toilets and a bidet, The Press Democrat newspaper reported Saturday.

Garcia's salmon-colored toilet was the subject of a legal battle before it was finally moved to Sonoma, to await shipment to a Canadian casino. It's unclear if the toilet was swiped by a wayward Deadhead or a thief remodeling a bathroom. Police have no suspects or leads. Henry Koltys bought Garcia's Marin County home for $1.39 million in 1997 and removed the toilet and other items he planned to sell to raise money for a charity.

After Koltys sold the house to a friend of the band's, the new owner sued to block the auction. The dispute was resolved last year, and Koltys moved the items to his home in Sonoma, about 40 miles north of San Francisco. Last month, Koltys sold the Grateful Dead singer's toilet for $2,550 to online casino Goldenpalace.com, which planned to use it as part of a traveling marketing exhibit. The casino is offering a $250 reward for its return.

Henry Koltys said Friday that the toilet once stood in the master bathroom of Garcia, who died in 1995 at age 53. "It would have been his personal head," he said. The casino has made other unusual purchases in the last year � it paid $25,000 for actor William Shatner's kidney stones and $28,000 for a grilled cheese sandwich that reportedly had the image of the Virgin Mary on it, Koltys said.

Jonathon Lipsin, who worked for Garcia as a gardener and now owns a Northern California record store, said the toilet might appeal to dedicated Deadheads.

"It's a little gross," Lipsin said. "But I could see it at a rock 'n' roll museum, too."

So basically, what we have here is a missing dead 'Head Deadhead' Head.

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I'm a day late, but happy 80th birthday to Anne McCaffrey.

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Have a good Sunday!

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